


shorelines in the moonlight

by Rhovanel



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Character Study, F/M, Gen, Pre-Relationship, crying about angaran mythology 2k17, jaal is the best thing to have ever happened to me, very minor spoilers for voeld missions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-03
Updated: 2017-04-03
Packaged: 2018-10-14 12:13:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10536237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rhovanel/pseuds/Rhovanel
Summary: ‘Our stories tell us that the yevara guided our ships, granting safe passage across the waters to find sheltered shores.’





	

There was something beautiful about Voeld.

It was so still, so quiet, with the lakes like cut glass and the sky a constant shimmer of stars and auroras. It felt like those moments in the middle of winter back on Earth, when the world was quiet and hushed, peaceful and reverent. Ryder thought Jaal and Vetra sensed it too - their conversations had an intimacy and a respect suited to those nights.

Sometimes she felt like the most alien thing about Jaal wasn’t his physical form or his language or even his speech mannerisms, but his unabashed emotional honesty. Humans were so cagey. You had to second-guess everything and everyone for ulterior motives. You learnt from a young age not to wear your heart on your sleeve. Especially if you’re a Ryder, she thought with a stab of grief. She remembers how much energy she’d poured into scrutinising every comment and gesture from her father to try and find some affection hidden deep within.

It was what she missed most about Scott. Honesty was their policy - they’d always know when the other was lying anyway, of course, but they tried to be as honest and open with each other to compensate for the tangle of deception they’d been born into. Even if he didn’t tell her, she always knew what he was thinking, and she always understood how he felt. 

Every time she thought about him lying in stasis on the Hyperion, she felt sick to her stomach. She’d told him the truth about their father and about the golden worlds, much to Harry’s glowering disapproval. If they couldn’t trust each other, they couldn’t trust anything, they’d always say. It seemed like no matter what direction she turned - Addison, the angara, even some of her crew - she found doubt and distrust and wariness. She felt like she was stumbling around in the dark, and she couldn’t even turn to the one thing that had always been the constant in her life.

‘You are quiet, Ryder.’ Jaal’s sonorous voice interrupted her thoughts, snapping her back to the present.

‘I’m watching the road, Jaal,’ she replied automatically.

Vetra snorted. ‘You know, for someone who’s meant to be a Pathfinder, you’re really not very good at following a path.’

Ryder cursed as she realised that in her introspection, she’d driven the Nomad off the road. Again. 

She tried to turn the Nomad around as smoothly as she could, but scraped the side of a rock formation, causing everyone in the car to wince. 

‘Um…if Gil asks, this was the kett,’ she said, opening the door and heading around the side to inspect the damage.

Ryder glanced behind her to make sure her companions had stayed in the Nomad, then leaned against the side of the vehicle, sighing and staring up at the stars. She knew Vetra was joking, but her words cut straight to her heart. Untrained, untested, untrustworthy. Would Cora have been a better pathfinder? Would Scott? 

Climbing back into the car, she was surprised to find that Jaal had moved to the front seat beside her.

‘Everything okay, Jaal?’ she asked, as she course-corrected and returned once more to the road. 

‘I am watching the road, Ryder,’ he said, and she laughed despite herself. Glancing into the backseat, she saw Vetra absorbed in something on her omni-tool.

‘Can I ask you something, Jaal?’ 

‘Of course,’ he said immediately.

‘Do you think I’m a bad pathfinder?’

Vetra’s head snapped up in the backseat. ‘Ryder, I was just messing - ‘

Ryder held up a hand. ‘I know, I know, it’s okay, Vetra. I just…I feel like I’m stumbling around in the dark. I’m supposed to be guiding the way, but…’ she trailed off, fingers tapping the steering wheel with agitation. ‘It’s the damned blind leading the blind.’

Jaal shifted in his seat, angling his body towards her. ‘Ryder, do you remember what I told you about the yevara?’

‘That they’re the only thing you have left from the pre-scourge past.’

‘They are…not so different from you.’ She could feel the intensity of his strange alien eyes on her face, and was almost grateful for the excuse to keep staring straight ahead.

She frowned. ‘Because we’re…ancient beings trapped under the ice? Wait, is it because we’re a relic from the past?’

‘That was not what I was thinking,’ said Jaal thoughtfully, ‘but now that you mention it…’

She snorted. 'Bit of human culture for you, Jaal,’ she said lightly. ‘It’s not polite to comment on a woman’s age.’

‘Really? What a strange species you are,’ he said. ‘Is age not a trophy of experience? Of wisdom?’

‘Of course it is, some people just don’t like the physical side-effects attached to the accumulating years.’

‘Side-effects?’

‘Well, our skin gets wrinkly, our hair turns grey and might fall out, our bodies get stiffer and more painful, our eyesight fails…’ She ground to a halt at the expression of horror on Jaal’s face.

‘Uh…I’ll explain back on the Tempest, maybe with Lexi’s help.’ 

Jaal nodded slowly, the horror not quite leaving his eyes. ‘Your skin…creases? Like crushed leaves?’

Vetra made a choking noise that sounded suspiciously like a poorly concealed laugh. 

‘So tell me, Jaal’, Ryder said hastily, trying to steer the conversation back to steadier ground, ’why is a human like a yevara?’

‘Not a human. You.’

‘Me specifically?’

‘Yes,’ he responded. ‘Our stories tell us that the yevara guided our ships, granting safe passage across the waters to find sheltered shores.’

She nodded. ‘Yes, I remember.’ She’d been taken with the imagery of it, so similar to stories from human mythology. 

‘That is…what you do. Guide your ships through the unknown. Find the path, so that your people can follow.’

‘I…I suppose it is,’ she said slowly. ‘Though if you think I’m going to start singing, guess again.’

Jaal laughed, a deep, clear sound that always sent shivers down her spine. She’d already learnt to treasure that sound in the short time she’d known him, and even though he was free and generous with his attentions, winning a laugh always felt as much a victory as a battle with the Kett.

‘Thank you, Jaal’, she said, turning to look at him so he could see the honesty in her face. ‘That means a lot to me.’

‘You are most welcome,’ he smiled. ‘But it is I who should be thanking you.’

‘Jaal, I’m happy to have you here, we all are,’ she replied, returning her eyes to the road. She remembered his face when he asked to stay aboard her ship, eagerness and hope tinged with fear of rejection.

‘Of course,’ he responded, ‘but that is not why I am thanking you.’ He paused for a moment, eyes fixed at a distant point ahead. She’d learned to love his particular speech pattern, with its oddly placed pauses and long silences. It made everything he said feel measured and thoughtful, like each word had a power and a truth that commanded the time and space to be heard.

Jaal turned to look at her once more. ‘Our stories say that the yevara’s song is so beautiful, it can call the sun. Reveal the stars. You are calling the sun for your people. And you have shown me the stars anew.’

Something turned over in her heart.

‘It is a brave and beautiful thing that you are doing, Ryder. Never forget it.’

She felt tears spring at the corner of her eyes, and she gripped the steering wheel tightly.

‘I do not know enough about your language’, Jaal continued, ‘but perhaps if we translated yevara, it would mean pathfinder.’

She took her eyes off the road to look at his face, so strange and alien and so completely readable all at once.

‘Jaal, I…that’s probably the nicest thing anyone has said to me since we arrived in Heleus.’

He smiled, and she felt her heart skip a beat. 

‘The road, Ryder,’ Vetra drawled without looking up from her omni-tool. 

Ryder snapped her eyes back to the front, feeling a blush spread across her cheeks. She risked a glance at Vetra, who was smirking but thankfully silent, and then at Jaal, who had returned to watching the landscape.

They drove on across the ice in companionable silence. Ryder smiled, feeling anchored as her thoughts drifted with the stars above and the yevara beneath.

**Author's Note:**

> I was really taken with the yevara mission and I had to get my feelings out of my system.
> 
> Technically I've only dipped my toe into the waters of the Jaal romance but I already know it's going to kill me. I'm hardly even halfway through the game, so no spoilers, please!
> 
> I have no idea what the inside of the Nomad is supposed to look like. Does it have a backseat? It does now!
> 
> Title comes from Josh Ritter's 'Change of Time'.


End file.
